My Bizarre Life

I’m still here…just haven’t had the pressing urge or time to write lately.  But with the start of a new year the impulse to reflect settles in and reflection almost always triggers the writing response in me.  So here I am doing what I love once again.  

After spending time in reflection I can sum up this last year of my life as bizarre. 

To me personally, I wouldn’t say it was completely bizarre…maybe more like absolutely imperfect and a little bit peculiar or curious.  But, I fully understand to the rest of the world it is most definitely, 100%, totally, bizarre. 

Here are some random reasons why:

Full of pride, I recently made a mini production of the importance of intentionally focusing on Jesus’ birth during the Christmas season rather than on American Christmas consumerism.  I emailed some of you a link to check out the advent devotional our family was going to use and encouraged you to do the same with your own families.  If you pictured our family circled around our advent wreath in the center of our coffee table all pretty and perfect faithfully devoted in prayer….well you pictured the wrong family!  Here’s what really happened.  The few weeks we actually did the devotionals our kids fought over who got to light the candles.  Then our adorable basset hound ate the entire advent devotional book about a week before Christmas so we never even got to the part when Jesus was born.   It’s appalling, I know.    

I have this uncultivated obsession to speak the Haitian Creole language which is neither needed nor advantageous where I live.   It’s enough to make people roll their eyes but I don’t care.  When no one is home I speak Creole to my dogs.  Bizarre yes, but in my defense, they don’t understand me when I speak English either.  In spite of this ridiculous fascination my husband calls me his Haitian princess and nearly always humors me when we are in the car and all I want to hear playing through our radio speakers is my “Creole Made Easy” cd.  I love you, Trey!!

I can practically navigate the Dallas Fort Worth, Fort Lauderdale, Miami, and Port au Prince airports in my sleep.  Totally bizarre for a directionally challenged girl like me.  I’m also a professional packer now.  My scale and I have mastered the art of packing 50 pound bags to meet the international requirements of American Airlines.   

As I glance over at my kitchen counter, I see the bag I have packed full of things a baby would need x 2 just sitting there.  Waiting.  If you haven’t heard, I’m expecting twins and my water could break  the phone could ring at any time…that bag is important.  I can remember the anticipation and excitement that stirred my mommy heart as I waited for my three biological children to be born.   My hospital bags were always packed and ready…of course it wasn’t ultra dramatic since I convinced my doctor to induce early with all three of them.  Have you noticed?  Patience is one of my gifts (grotesque sarcasm inserted).  I can now testify that the anticipation and excitement of waiting for our adopted babies is different in almost every way from having biological children but there is that same familiar thrill that pulses through my blood when I ponder the miracle of a new baby (two of them) about to become a real part of our family.  It’s both terrifying and wonderful.  Even as I’m writing the sensation of this thrill makes my heart quicken.  The bag sits there waiting for the phone call that will tell us it’s time to pick up our twin treasures from Haiti.  Then all of the fighting and waiting will be over and 2 twin girls will move out of an orphanage from a 3^rd world poverty stricken country and into our forever family.  It’s the part of the story when what we have believed for will become real.  A glimpse of God’s redemptive plan will grace our broken world and we are sure to cry lots of happy tears. 

As I looked back over my life story in 2011 the presence of one thing remained constant through all of my joys, tears, victories, and falls.  This one thing nourished my soul and strengthened my heart.  It’s what kept me alive and even today the reason I live.  It was God’s mysterious sacrificial love.  A love so deep I dare not claim to ever fully comprehend it.  It’s a love I undeservingly soak up and then strive to give to others.  That day my holy and innocent Jesus hung bloody and broken on the cross for MY many sins…that is the love I speak of…it’s absolutely bizarre.   

So I give praise to my sweet Jesus today for everything bizarre that defined my life in 2011 because I truly love every bit of my beautiful-wonderful-full- bizarre life!  I want Jesus.  I want His love.  I want to give His love.  If all of that is bizarre then I welcome all things bizarre. 

I pray for even more of a bizarre life in 2012…one overflowing with HIS wild, untamed, crazy LOVE!      

I waited all day today for an update on our baby girls.  I wanted to hear they got their medical checks completed.  I never got an email from our orphanage but just a few hours ago my friend and Haitian coordinator at the orphanage posted on my facebook wall.  If you understand Haitian Creole you may already know the good news.  For everyone else, our girls had their medical checks done today and they are expecting the results back on Tuesday and tomorrow they will write the US embassy for their visa appointment.  The US visa is the VERY LAST STEP of this whole bizarre process!  Will you pray for an expedited Visa process???  

ALL THE MCKINLEY GIRLS TOGETHER ON DECEMBER 13, 2011

GOD TOOK PASTOR NAHUM AND HIS WIFE AND WROTE THEIR LIFE STORIES ON THE TABLET OF MY HEART...THEY WILL ALWAYS BE RAPHAELLA AND WANA'S FIRST PAPA AND MAMA.  WE ARE FOREVER FAMILY.  

God has done this!  

2012 Bring on the bizarre!